TOWARD A SIMPLER AMERICAN (HOLIDAY) STORY

November 5, 2017

| Anne Williamson |

I am not the poster child for simple living. I don’t live in a tiny house in the woods off the grid. I don’t raise livestock, darn socks or knit. I enjoy eating out, and many nights, thank g/God for TV dinners. We own two cars and more stuff than we need.

This does not mean I don’t strive to live simpler. Over a span of 15 years, I have made significant changes in the way I live and interact with “stuff.” I started off making these changes out of concern for my fellow humans and our planet. I keep making changes also because I've found peace in doing so....

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IN MARRIAGE AND DEMOCRACY WE MUST STOP DEMONIZING THE "OTHER"

October 22, 2017

| Anne Williamson |

Synchronicity. It’s a great word – to say, but even more so, to experience. As I was imagining and researching the topics for this round, I came across two seemingly unrelated articles: one, on why some marriages last and others fail, and the other, a conversation between former President Obama and author Marilynne Robinson on, among other things, the state of America’s democracy. Surprisingly, the two articles discussed similar ideas.

As I continued researching Robinson’s perspective on democracy, the growing similarities between it and creating lasting relationships turned my initial calm curiosity into outright geeky giddiness. Don’t worry; I’ll spare you the graduate paper I wish I had been assigned. I simply want to use this week’s blog post to encourage you to read and discuss. WAYfinding participants this round get the benefit of me having culled the most relevant segments from four unique Robinson conversations and articles, but for others reading this, start here. Then, also read the marriage article, which is not just for the coupled among us. In particular, pay attention to what both articles say about how to stop demonizing the o/Other in your life so there's space for a new story to emerge.

Many of you are already taking part in a WAYfinding group this week, giving space and new perspectives to your reflections. This, among other things, is the gift of what we do in WAYfinding. But, if you’re not in a group, first, you're welcome anytime. We're at the halfway point, and you'd be welcome to jump in (at half the cost) for the last 4 weeks to see what you think. Sign-up for the group of your choice here. Or, if participating isn’t possible, set an intention to read and share these articles and your thoughts with others. Loving better than we did yesterday – like relationships, like democracy – is not a given, it’s (to borrow Robinson’s words) “a made thing that we make continuously.” May it be so for you this week.

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THE ILLUSIONARY NATURE OF OUR FEELINGS

October 8, 2017

| Anne Williamson |

A friend this week wrote a beautiful reflection on social media on how being a mother had changed her. She spoke of learning to “dig deep when I think I have nothing left to give… and I find depths and resources I never knew I had.” She also spoke of fierceness, appreciating the moment, and “the art of going with the flow.” Then she asked other mamas to chime in.

Others did. I did too and wrote, “Watching my daughters’ emotions change so rapidly has made me aware of, in a deeper way, the fluid nature of my own emotions. That they aren’t always representative of the truth… that they just are. Notice them, accept them, move on.”

Of course, this is not always easy....

CURIOSITY - THE WAY OF THE WISE

October 1, 2017

| Anne Williamson |

Have you heard of Jimmy Fallon's "Do Not Read" list? In this "bit," he humorously draws our attention to books we seemingly would not want to read because they're obviously too boring or off-putting. The problem is I've wanted to read a few - not "The Complete Book of Exercise Walking" or "The Joy of Uncircumcising," but admittedly, I was somewhat curious about "The Natural History of Vacant Lots." I don't know, maybe it's the dormant urban planner in me or environmentalist. It doesn't really matter; the point is, it's a problem. It's why I have 6 partially read books and another handful of magazines on my nightstand at all times. My curiosity runneth over!

Curiosity may not lead to magazine-ready bedsides, but in my opinion, it does lead to the best kind of life....

BREAKING FREE FROM OLD STORIES

September 24, 2017

| Anne Williamson |

Sometimes it seems like all I did as a kid was imagine. With creative neighbors at my side, my mom’s minivan became a rocket ship. We’d float around it pretending we were in zero gravity, and the horn an alarm for some terrible electrical malfunction. Later, the floors inside the house became dangerous alligator swamps. We’d toss out pillows, jumping from one to the next until safely on land again. I’d imagine things about my future too. I actually had a “make believe” son named Todd before I met and married my husband, Todd. And, I imagined where I would travel, who I would meet, what I would be doing with my life. That unlike how I felt at the time, I imagined someday I’d be comfortable in my own skin.

There is a large part of me that believes my whole life is the result of this imagination, and really continues to be....

FINDING PEACE & JOY, SIMPLY

March 6, 2016

| Anne Williamson |

This does not mean I don’t strive to live simpler. Over a span of 15 years, I have made significant changes in the way I live and interact with “stuff.” I started off making these changes out of concern for my fellow humans and our planet. I kept making changes because I found peace in doing so.

This peace has come not with any sort of “arrival” but through the journey of gradually eliminating some things so that other things may speak more freely, may take up more space, in my life....

FORGIVENESS AT THE HOLIDAY TABLE

November 15, 2015

| Anne Williamson |

All forgiveness involves grief… I will never know what it feels like to be a boy unconditionally loved by his father. The story of our marriage will never be a fairy tale again. I have broken people I love with my own brokenness. Those 10 years, I’ll never get those back.

This is what makes forgiveness so hard. It’s also what makes it sticky. Our grief deserves space; we must give it time. And yet, hold on too long and you begin to identify with… no, as it. The grief becomes entangled in your self – shaping the stories you tell, the life you create.

My favorite definition of forgiveness comes from a 1990 guest on The Oprah Winfrey show named Harold. Paraphrasing him, Oprah says, “Forgiveness is giving up the hope that the past could be any different.” It’s not condoning or excusing; it’s accepting what was, and even what currently is…

ON BEING WRONG

October 11, 2015

WAYfinding and Speak Your Story present... On Being Wrong

Ira Glass, host of NPR’s “This American Life,” told “Wrongologist” Kathryn Schulz that “as a staff, we joke that every single episode of our show has the same crypto-theme: I thought this one thing was going to happen and something else happened instead.” This is the crypto-theme of every good story because this is the truth of life. So, why do we resist it!?

Join us as we hear from three individuals whose stories were broken open and made infinitely more interesting by being wrong. They'll share, we'll ask questions, consider our own stories, and all walk away a bit braver when it comes to being wrong.

Doors open @ 6:30p. Event begins at 7:00p. Beer, wine and non-alcoholic refreshments provided, as well as a few nibblies.

Sugguested donation: $10 per person

LET US KNOW YOU'RE COMING ON FACEBOOK OR EMAIL

Our Storytellers:

Jonathan Cracraft
Jon has often felt caught searching for compromises between opposing forces and identities: mainstream vs counter-culture; materialism vs anti-materialism; commerciality vs spirituality; establishment vs revolution. After dropping out of graduate school, he wandered, lived on communes - eventually becoming a teacher at an alternative school. Upon moving back to Indianapolis, he was unexpectedly offered a management position by the regional agency for MassMutual, where he eventually became the director of financial planning. He is currently the director of client services for a local wealth management firm, C.H. Douglas & Gray. He lives with his wife and young daughter. He is well qualified to speak about being wrong.

Sandra Gutridge Harris
Sandra has been a storyteller since 1976. She has told in festivals around the country and in venues as varied as the Indiana Women's Prison and the White House Easter Egg Roll. She and her husband were active in civil rights in Birmingham, Ala. during the 60's, and were "encouraged" to leave that city by the KKK in 1963. She counts this as her proudest achievement.

Rev. Rae Karim
A 2014 graduate of Christian Theological Seminary, Rae is a poet, entrepreneur, vocalist with the multicultural worship group Limitless, daughter, sister, friend, and aunt to the best nieces a girl could ask for! Recognizing the gift of words she has been given, Rae enjoys expressing that gift through aspects such as preaching, poetry, and worship through the arts.

YOUR WHOLE LIFE IS SPEAKING

September 6, 2015

| Anne Williamson |

Recently, for an article coming out in October on WAYfinding, I was asked this question, "What's your ultimate goal?" My response:

For me, one of the most interesting and important questions in life is: To what do you live faithfully? Because, we all live faithfully to something. As theologian Paul Tillich would say, “We all have an Ultimate Concern.” You would think this would be a question we’d be encouraged to explore in school, at work, at home – since it impacts everything we do – but it’s generally not. Often, our Ultimate Concern develops and resides in our subconscious alone. For me, this is no good. Our Ultimate Concern, that to which we live faithfully, needs to be drawn out and evaluated: Is it what you thought? Is it worthy of your whole life?

On a deep level, this is the point of WAYfinding: to help people discover an Ultimate Concern worthy of their whole life. And then, to help them learn to live faithfully to that Concern everyday, to learn to listen to it. This, to me, is faith, and it requires a kind of bravery and permission beyond the mandatory checking of certain belief boxes.

This, then, is why, in WAYfinding, our lens, our shared commitment, is not a statement of beliefs but a process. ...

DO YOUR CORE BELIEFS & VALUES GUIDE YOUR LIFE?

July 26, 2015

| Jim Thorne |

"The marvelous thing about learning from a story is that the story never ends, so our learning from it need not end either." - Parker Palmer

While at lunch with an acquaintance, he brought me up short with this question: “So, Jim, at your core, what are your deepest held beliefs and values and how do they influence your daily activities?” My first thought was, “Gosh, I thought this was just a friendly lunch.” My second thought was, “What a great question.”

In responding to the question, I realized it was not immediately clear to me what my core beliefs and values were. This was a wake-up call. I had a good sense of how I lived my life, but I found clearly articulating my beliefs and values difficult. I thought, “If they’re not clear to me, then they’re not fully influencing my daily activities.” My curiosity was awakened. ...

OUR BODIES TELL OUR STORIES

July 19, 2015

| Carolyn Lesmeister |

"Movement never lies. It is a barometer telling the state of the soul's weather." - Martha Graham

Our bodies tell our stories.

Old or young, large or small, wrinkled or taut; stretch-marked or scarred, they say something about who we are and what we’ve experienced.

Even more than physical characteristics that we may or may not be able to control, what we do with our bodies communicates powerful messages not only to the people around us, but also to our very own selves.

Have you ever paid attention to how you respond physically to different emotions?...

UNSPOKEN STORIES

June 7, 2015

| Anne Williamson |

We are story-telling creatures. We tell our stories at length in books and film, and in short vignettes on Facebook and Instagram. We ask our roommates - aged 2 to 102 - to tell us the stories of their day, to listen as we share ours. We shout our stories, whisper them, sing them, photograph them, pray them. And, not just our own: we love telling the stories of others too.

All these stories we tell, we hear, they swirl around us. Are they also a part of us? Becoming so? What pieces of the stories we tell speak to the unspoken stories, beliefs, inside? What pieces of the stories we hear become the foundations of our new "unspokens"?

Because in a lifetime of telling stories, it is the unspoken ones that matter most. ...

REDEFINING FAITHFULNESS

March 29, 2015

| ANNE WILLIAMSON |

In the faith world, this is a week for powerful stories. Christians will tell and hear of the life, death and resurrection of Jesus. It will remind them hate never has the final word, and peace, wholeness, is possible. Jews will begin the Passover celebration. They'll recount the story of their ancestors' deliverance from slavery in Egypt, as well as ongoing struggles against tyranny - both external and internal. They'll hear the story and remember freedom need not be a mere dream.

These are big stories, meaningful. Stories that have been at the heart of Western cultures for centuries. They inspire us. Confuse us. Won't leave us alone - often, even when we're intentionally trying to leave them behind. They're a part of our histories, families, secular and sacred rituals, literature and movies. They are stories in which people all over the world have faith.

Yet, they are stories about which our beliefs differ. Outside the traditions, and within them, we hear these stories and interpret them differently, allow them different places of meaning in our lives. What are we to make of this? Are we to assume some of us have it "right" and others "wrong"? Namely, me, I have it right, and you, you have it wrong. Or, can we imagine a different way? Can we allow each other different versions of the s/Story, different meanings, as long as those meanings soak in love? As long as they move us to live deeper and love better than we did yesterday. Can we begin to define faithfulness this way?

THE IMPORTANCE OF STORY

May 6, 2014

|ANNE WILLIAMSON|

WAYfinding is both a growing online community, through this blog, and a "bricks and mortar" community in Indianapolis. For the last two weeks, the latter has been discussing the importance of story. Namely, in taking the time to detail and reflect on our life story(ies) thus far, its lessons, patterns and wisdom can arise.

The importance of such work was echoed beautifully in a NPR Here & Now story last week titled "Restarting Life Out From Under Polio's Shadow." In it, Gail Caldwell thoughtfully reflects on how a surgery in her 50s that greatly improved a limp she'd had from polio since 6 months of age challenged her story.

LEARN, then let's reflect and LOVE together and keep LISTENing...

WAYfinding and Speak Your Story present... On Being Wrong

Our Storytellers:

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